Middle age is having a choice between two temptations and choosing the one that'll get you home earlier. ~Dan Bennett
He didn't tell me how to live; he lived, and let me watch him do it. ~Clarence Budington Kelland
Fatherhood is pretending the present you love most is soap-on-a-rope. ~Bill Cosby
Never raise your hand to your kids. It leaves your groin unprotected. ~Red Buttons
It is not flesh and blood but the heart which makes us fathers and sons. ~Johann Schiller
May you live to be a hundred yearsWith one extra year to repent.~Author Unknown
Inflation is when you pay fifteen dollars for the ten-dollar haircut you used to get for five dollars when you had hair. ~Sam Ewing
Middle age is having a choice between two temptations and choosing the one that'll get you home earlier. ~Dan Bennett
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Youth is a wonderful thing. What a crime to waste it on children. ~George Bernard Shaw
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You're not 40, you're eighteen with 22 years experience. ~Author Unknown
It kills you to see them grow up. But I guess it would kill you quicker if they didn't. ~Barbara Kingsolver, Animal Dreams
I'm sixty years of age. That's 16 Celsius. ~George Carlin, Brain Droppings, 1997
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A father is always making his baby into a little woman. And when she is a woman he turns her back again. ~Enid Bagnold
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